Super Bowl Halftime 2015

Super Bowl Halftime 2015

(photo source:

Short of the cliche jaw-dropping planned surprises from halftime shows in the past, this year’s Super Bowl halftime show had our jaws dropping for legitimate reasons, such as Missy Elliott. From the disappointingly stunted Lenny Kravitz appearance, to my favorite character of all – Left Shark, there were a few lows but a lot of great highs during this year’s halftime show, one major high being the lack of scandalous.

I did not watch the Super Bowl on Sunday, unlike about 98% of social media, mostly because I couldn’t care less about either team, but I’m also not a football fan. I’ll watch if I’m with people who want to, but I don’t go out of my way to witness it. In years past, I would, however, tune in to catch the infamous halftime show. A few years ago, though, I lost interest in even that.

The only thing I found relevant about the Super Bowl was the halftime show and the commercials and, given you can watch either of those online post Super Bowl, neither of those hold the urgency they did maybe five years ago. The commercials are still good – my favorite is still last year’s men of Full House reunion over Greek yogurt – but the halftime entertainment lost its value for me.

Thanks to the Beyonces and Janets of halftimes past, it is no longer about music or even entertainment, but about sexually explosive performances that landed someone in front page news. Poorly staged wardrobe malfunctions (come on, no one really believed Janet’s faux pas was any kind of faux) and one bad wardrobe malfunction short of a strip show, some of the leading ladies of music left me disappointed. So I stopped caring.

This year was the first year I did not watch the Super Bowl halftime performance live on TV.

Although I decided to forego the tradition this year, not even 48 hours after the Bowl my newsfeed overflowed with a multitude of opinions, on both sides of the fence, about Katy Perry‘s performance and – GASP! – the surprise throwdown by Missy Elliott. MISSY?! I was intrigued. The soundtrack of my high school years were mostly rapped by Missy Elliott, and I immediately wanted to form my own opinion on this collaboration.

I like Katy about 60% of the time; a lot of her music is catchy and has sick beats (I would be lying if I said Dark Horse was not still one of my favorite bass lines), not to mention she started off as a Christian music singer, which I find incredibly interesting, considering. So I pulled the entire 13 minutes and some change up on YouTube and gave it a chance. It couldn’t be worse than nipple flashes and slutty outfits, right?

I felt a mixture of satisfied and pleasantly surprised, while a little disappointed and left wanting. So first of all, the things I wish would have been different: I’ll just say it – Lenny Kravitz was there why? Don’t get me wrong – I am a huge, huge, HUGE Kravitz fan. His down and dirty guitar riffs and crooning drives me crazy in a good way, but he spun around on that stage like he was about to rock our faces, was playing all of 30 seconds, and didn’t even sing any of his own material?!

Kravitz sang a Katy song. A Katy song that rather annoys me, not to mention, but that’s beside the point. I hoped that once they finished screaming about cherry lipstick, they’d maybe go halfsies on American Woman or Again or even Are You Gonna Go My Way, but alas, I was left disappointed as his 15 seconds in the spotlight ended and Katy continued on by herself. Bummer.

Singing beach balls, giant mechanical lions and dancing sharks. That’s an odd statement to even say, right? I saw a lot of people commenting negatively on the giant puppeted lion Katy rode in on at the start of the show and I was so curious to see for myself just what was so lame about it. How about ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. Are you kidding?

First of all, major props to the chick for standing on that enormous thing that could have easily malfunctioned at any time and still managing to exude the essence that she was in charge over that huge piece of robot. I know they had her strapped on, but I was still impressed. And, sidenote, to those joking that her song is about the “eye of the tiger” not “eye of the lion:” did you even listen to the words? She OBVIOUSLY states she’ll roar like a lion.

As for the oddly enjoyable beach party – I’m on the fence with this part of it. At first, I felt like it was a poorly choreographed acid trip and I wanted out, but I can’t even deny the fact that those singing beach balls were the cutest thing of my entire life. And that one dancing shark that was back there just killing it on his own terms really made my entire day. To be honest, I forgot Katy was even there after a while and I just wanted to party with those oversized stuffed animals behind her.

Then just as I was about to lose interest in Katy’s trip down Teenage Dream lane, it got interesting. Even though the surprise was ruined for me, I still could not sit still as that Get Ya Freak On beat dropped. Who doesn’t love that song? If you don’t, then we can’t be friends. And just like that, Missy came out of the shadows and threw down that Super Bowl halftime show. Why did they even invite Katy Perry again? Missy had it under control. As she whizzed her way through GYFO, Work It and one of my all-time favorites, Lose Control, I did all but lose control. The only complaint I had about her entire performance was that Katy really was just unnecessary at that point and was just taking up space. We would’ve been cool if she took a break or just sat down and let MisDemeanor have at it.

Katy sweetly closed out the show, though, giving credit where credit’s due. Even though the shooting star made it seem more like a “The More You Know” commercial – wait, was that a shameless plug, NBC? – Firework is still a good song with a good message behind it, so I can’t even remark badly on that part.

Now, most importantly, onto the biggest thing I noticed about the show overall – the lack of slutty. Was anyone else surprised by the lack of stomach bile in their mouth after it was over? In halftime shows past, I was left with an urge to throw up in my mouth by all of the unnecessarily scandalous behavior. With barely any cleavage throughout the entire performance – even those girls in swimsuits were covering both cleavage and belly button – there was such an absence of skin, I’d almost forgotten what it was like to watch a halftime show that wouldn’t make me uncomfortable to watch with my mom or dad.

I’m not sure if it was intentional or not, but I did pay notice to the fact that even though Katy did choose one of her racier songs (I Kissed A Girl) to include in the setlist, it was the one she sang with a male lead, who took over the chorus lines of the song, making it much less racier than if Katy, or any other female, were singing it.

For the most part, I rather enjoyed the show. Were there things I would have liked to see done differently? Of course. Were there things I wish would have lasted longer and others I wish hadn’t happened at all? Sure. But compared to Super Bowls past, this one was definitely worth sitting down to watch, football aside.



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